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Thursday, December 4, 2008

Chapter 2 - Kanna vs. Keny

Hi, it’s been quite some time since I completed Chapter 1. I have just been a little too lazy and thought a lot about how the people here in America will react to some amount of controversial wording and descriptions. So going forward, all descriptions of people will be based on real life characters, but due to privacy laws and issues the names of the characters will be changed. 

United States of America!! You will learn to love the place once you come here. So after the adventures of the flight, I was on my way home with my sister. It was a nice 45 min ride home with lots of traffic moving at a phenomenal speed. I couldn't help but admire the traffic system. Tons of people driving on the right side of the road on automatics. Although I admired the system, my male Indian ego would only let me pass a comment like "I'd rather drive on the crowded streets on Bangalore with a stick shift". 

We finally got to Waltham, a small suburb of Boston. My sister lived in this beautiful condo. It was clean and quiet. I enjoyed the first 4 days I stayed there. Just in case one of my cousins or close buddies in Bangalore are reading this, "I washed my own dishes even at my sister's place and mixed the rice and dal on my own". Yes it’s true; I never mixed rice on my own until the age of 22. I tried to keep the place clean but was never up to my sister's standards. 

After 4 days we headed out on a stormy night to Rochester, NY. This was about an hour from Syracuse. This was where Chetan Keny (name not changed, as I am confident family won't sue me) staid. Chetan was my sister's friend, at least that’s what she said. She had claimed he liked her, and so did she likewise. We reached Chetan's house at about midnight. There stood the man I detested separated by 10 ft of distance and 50miles of discomfort. 

Round 1: We looked at each other. We both mumbled "Hi". Once inside, he showed us the room and asked me to get comfortable. How?? How?? How?? I was in his backyard; he was the big dog in this part of the woods. All I could say in my mind was "Try come and do this in Bangalore!!" The guy was supposedly a humble genius. He soon started showing concern after my sister urged him to. He asked me questions about my education and what I wanted to do. I replied in mono-syllables. I was being the a##h#$e of the century. It finally got to him, so he stopped asking the actually concerned questions. Darn it, this guy seemed like a nice guy. But, he's a guy!! He likes my sister. Nobody is supposed to like my sister in that kind of way until my mom says so!! It's the rule!! 

Bell rings!!

Score: Chetan 10 Raghav 2 

Commercial Break Theory!!

This is when I remembered my father's theory "If you dislike a person, no matter what they do, good or bad, your perception of what they say would be in the most negative fashion. The opposite applied for people you liked," This was so true. 

Round 2: We sat on the couch and watched Sarkar. Then began the most awkward 10min of 2005. Half way through the movie my sister decided to break the ice. She was like one of those parents with 2 eight year olds. She would turn to Chetan and ask a question for which she knew the answer, just to make him have a conversation with me. Then, she would turn to me and do the same. It was really bad. The amazing timing had the music "Govinda Govinda Govindaaaaaa!!" playing in the background. They were these two nerds in love and I was the one in the way, complete Bollywood style.

Bell Rings!!

Score: Chetan 0 Raghav 0 - Savitha gets 100 for outside interference. 

Commercial Break Theory!!

Govinda Govinda - is a phrase used to describe "Oh sh#@, you've lost it all now!!” That wasn't the meaning in the song.

Round 3: The next morning we headed to Syracuse University. We stopped at an outlet mall in Waterloo. We shopped for whatever was necessary for school. This day I was mature and ignorant about his presence. I went on my own, bought what I needed even though they offered to buy everything. My sis did end up buying me a bag. My sister expected him to win the family over Shah Rukh Khan style. But, I was just too busy in my world. He had better things going for him then trying to convince a stubborn spoilt 22 year old brat that he was good for his sister. So we both went in opposite directions. This made my sis take both of us aside one by one and give us a yelling of the century. We were both grounded. 

Bell Rings!!

Score: Raghav 8 Chethan 6 Savitha -150 for unruly behaviour.

Result: Raghav gets disqualified for unsportsman like conduct. Chetan lives to fight another day. The promoter Savitha has lost a lot in arranging this bout.

Shopping was done and we headed straight to Syracuse, a university town.

This information given right here is extremely classified therefore the size 8 text. Later that night Kanna went on to speak to his mother who wanted to know if Chetan was a nice guy and was good for his sis. The sneaky cheeky bum went on to lie to his mother and say the man was a dreadful person.

Three Point Two Seven Years in America

Chapter 1: Kanna goes to America

Its been about three point two zero years in America, there is still about zero point zero seven years left. So how tough is it to recollect whatever I want to remember or pen out?? Only this blog will give me such an answer.

After the most amazing 4 years of my life in R.V College of Engineering in Bangalore at the age of 22, it was time. I was finally going to leave Bangalore. This was the first time I was leaving home. I have never ever lived for more then 2 weeks at a stretch outside Bangalore. Who was I going to trust?? Who was going to pessanjify (mix) my rice?? Who was going to wash my clothes ?? Who was going to give me money when I needed to go out?? Which company was going to reimburse my monstrous petrol (gas) bills and cell phone bills (Thank you Mr. Padhmanabhan) ?? The answer was ME.........

I left Bangalore on the 6th of August 2005, for my flight on the 8th of August 2005 out of Chennai.. Thanks to Mr. Venkatesan I had a pretty cheap deal from Lufthansa and 1000$ for a laptop. Yes, I can from a family having two extremely generous uncles.. Spent two days in Chennai with my cousins who were slowly moving away as they had just got married.. This was the last time the 5 cousins Koushik, Karthik, Hari, Gayathri and me went out together.. I doubt that would happen again.. All I can say about that night of drinking was Koushik's standard last words "Guys you know why we were happy and successful??" Nobody answered even though we all knew the answer.. "It's because we are family!!".. Time for group hug... LOL!!!

It was the 8th of August, my uncle, aunt, Gayathri and my mom drove me to the Airport.. It was the weirdest of send-offs.. The car stopped by the International Departures Terminal, I loaded my two massive bags on the trolley, said the words "Bye, Take care" and just walked off... There were no hugs, no tears, no "wodambay pathako!!"(take care of your health).. Once I was standing in the line to check in my bags I realized what I had just done.. That's when I really felt like drove over 4 people who came all the way to send me off..

Security check-in, went really smooth.. I, Raghav Rajagopalan the iyer kid went and bought myself a Chicken Sandwich and munched away, knowing i had 2 hours left.. With nothing left to do, I went to a phone booth and called Smrithi(family friend that lived down the street) of all people.. I broke down and cried for a minute... I didn't even know why.. I don't remember if she laughed at me or said take care.. She was always brutal and maybe I needed that..

Finally I was on the Flight, a wonderful aisle seat just as I wanted.. Wasn't luck brilliant?? I was seated next to a 50+ couple from Andhra Pradhesh.. Just as I was about to close my eyes, the man started a game called 50 questions: What is your name? Where are you from? Where are you going? Why are you going? What do you plan to do there? Which University? lalallalallalalal lalalallal lalalalallal ... I answered all of the questions.. I honestly didn't realize we even took off!!

45 min into the flight.. The air-hostess came by serving beverages.. :) :)... I remember every trip my uncles and cousins used to go on describing the free alcohol on international flights.. This was my first, so kindly understand the level of excitement!! So the air-hostess was still three rows behind me coming really slowly.. Every student behind me was ordering for a pepsi, orange juice or a tomato juice.. These guys were genuinely good kids.. Finally my row got its chance to order.. The old couple in chorus "Orange Juice no ice!!"..

The airhostess turned to me and knew what I wanted immediately on seeing the glow in my eyes.. But she played the game and did her job..
Airhostess (AH): Sir, what would you like to drink??
Me: What do you have to drink??
AH: Sir we have pepsi, 7up, orange juice, pineapple juice , etc..
Me: But, what do you have to drink drink?? (What was i thinking drink drink)
AH: Sir pepsi, 7up and orange juice are something you can drink drink (Was she joking?)
Me: No, you know like drink drink?
AH: Ok sir, what do you want?
Me: Vodka with 7up!!
AH: Sir we have only Finland Vodka
Me: Thats fine (Like I know the difference as long as it OC [free])

I took the first sip of my drink and turned to my left, the couple looked straight as if they were in Military School and didn't talk to me the rest of the trip.. Tadaaaaaaa!! As the AH walked away there were 4 guys behind me who stopped her.. These were the pepsi boys.. "Could I have a beer?? Could I get some rum and coke?? What wines do you carry??"... After all these were Engineering students, they had to drink!!

9 hours later, 2 movies and 2 free drinks later, I landed in Frankfurt. The security there checked our passports. The lady in charge asked the man next to her "Warum fahren diese Indianischen Studenten nach Amerika Zu Studieren? ".. Me being the eavesdropper I am, answered the question thanks to the course in Max Muller Bhavan "Das ist, weil wir gute Aufgaben erhalten, und spreche Englisch" in the worst Deutsche accent.. Just in case you didnt understand she asked "Why do all these Indian students go to america to study?" I replied "Thats cause we get better jobs and speak English".. She laughed and questioned "Sprechen sie duetsche?" I replied "Ja!!"(pronounced Ya)...

So, I searched for a cafe closest to my terminal. Everything was written in deutsche.. There was 10 different types of beers.. I had to use the 50 Euros I had.. So, the spendthrift was at large once again!! I looked for a phone once I was done, but being an educated engineer I couldn't figure how to use such an advanced machine to call home!! So then started the next leg of the Flight: Frankfurt to Boston.. Here I come!!

This flight was loaded with food european style.. The airhostess came up and said "Sir we are extremely sorry we only have steak left!!" I acted upset for 10seconds.. Another oscar nomination... The words came out really slow "Alright, I'll have it!! What kind of wine goes best with it??" She mentioned 3 really sophisticated names which I had no clue off.. I just chose the one that sounded the best and said "That one!!" I still dont know wine names, they require a certain amount of class!!

Another 7 hours later we were on the coast of america, just over the Atlantic.. I was busy filling away the form where I had to mention what kind of food items I had brought.. I specifically told my mom I wanted nothing.. But my sister wanted some stuff.. So lets start filling the form:
1 jar manga thokku
1 box K.C.Das sweets
2 boxes Asha Sweets
6 different Massalas
1 packet of instant coffee
.
.
.
Just joking I didnt fill anything in the form.. Finally the plane was about to land... I still could see only water.. The plane was going down down down down.. Holy crap we were going to land on water.. And then.. there was land... How was I to know Logan airport was just off the coast?? After the wonderful customs procedures, where you could see the custom officers eyes saying "Da Da Da, Another one bites the dust!!!".. I was finally out with all bags intact..

Would you know it, my sister Savitha wasnt there.. Then the challenge came between me and the public phone once again.. round 2 was going to be mine.. The phone worked!! It was me, me and only me smiling.. Then came an automatic voice message.. "Please insert 50 cents more to call outside the state!!".. As I searched my pocket for change I saw a girl 5 ft 2 inches searching for her brother.. There she was..

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